Monday, August 05, 2013

As go the sand states

My house sold this weekend. The offer was about 5% higher than I--in my more optimistic moments--had thought the place could conceivably fetch, let alone would actually bring. 

It's not all jubilation, though. It requires that I cover all closing costs, home insurance for a year, and that I leave my major appliances in the house for the buyers to use. The owners-to-be have a common Hispanic surname (that ends in a "z") and are receiving a loan from the USDA. (Yes, apparently the department of agriculture is in the business of making home loans, it's news to me as well. This looks like a portal for the sort of loan my buyers are receiving.) 

What's the required down payment for their loan, you ask? Why, zilch, of course--as in they're receiving 100% financing and putting zero percent down. My humble abode is no mcmansion, but we're talking about Kansas here. It's right smack in the middle for houses in this state. 

Clearly my buyers, presumably meat packers, fruit pickers, or laborers in some other agricultural capacity, don't have a penny to their names, but why should that stop them from living as well as--or, more likely, better than--I have been living? It's the American Dream, after all. I'm a sucker for not realizing how much more pleasant it is to build at sea level and live on the beach than it is to construct something way up in the mountains, without a mortgage even. 


6 comments:

silly girl said...

See this is the point I made, oh, a long while ago, I think here on this blog to some fool who showed up in the comments section claiming that third world peasants would push up demand for housing and increase the value of my house! LOL. Yeah, my 4000 sq. ft. house, sure. My argument with him was that demand has generally been defined as willing and able to pay. Obviously those folks are just renting from Uncle Sam. They aren't really buyers.

Anonymous said...

This house will either be foreclosed upon within 2 years or majorly deteriorate and lose value.

Mestizos aren't known for taking care of things. I used to own some rentals and mestizos would absolutely destroy them...At one property a guy used to piss in a drain in the garage because he didn't want to walk 15 feet into the house to use the toilet. The entire garage smelled like piss.

Also, Mexican food has that body odor smell that will eventually make a house stink and it's hard to get out that smell.

Other complaints: they refused to mow the lawns, they would put cardboard over broken windows instead of fixing them or telling me about them, they kept vicious pit bulls chained up in backyards (probably for fighting) that destroyed the lawn, there would be who-knows-what splattered all over the walls that wouldn't come off, all the walls and doors of the houses were scraped up...

Nightmare....

Anonymous said...

Are you staying in same city or moving to different area of country?

Audacious Epigone said...

SG,

Take that one Austrian step farther and not only are resources being put to suboptimal use, the opportunity costs are making us all poorer.

Anon,

Yes, I joked with one of my neighbors yesterday, warning him not to be surprised if he sees chickens roaming around in the backyard in a month. It's a good deal for us, though, and I want to be settled into a new house by the time the baby arrives. It's a cop out, I realize, but who cares about sense of community anymore, anyway? I'm making the neighborhood more diverse, after all.

Anon2,

To answer my own rhetorical question, the place we'll be moving into if fortune smiles upon me. Same metro area, just bigger and nicer and capable of hosting a (hopefully) burgeoning family.

nydwracu said...

I used to think people were kidding about the chickens, but the street my father lives on has gone almost completely Hispanic, and the last time I went over to visit, guess what the people the next house over had in their backyard.

J said...

Who is dumb?

Who is envious?

What's the problem with the chickens? The lay eggs.